You Are Not Alone



I wanted to tell you that I understand what is happening to you. I know what its like to be afraid to be noticed. I know how important it is to keep a secret, and be ashamed of what you live with everyday. I want you to know that I, too, have known real fear. You are not alone. I, like you, have endured the most humiliating and brutal pain that a woman may ever endure. I know what its like to apologize for crying, after being beaten, bruised, or worse. I understand why you don’t encourage friendships. Every time you shed a tear…please know that I have shed the same one. Most of your family, and probably none of your friends, know what your life is really like…past the smile you show everyone…but I do. Do you still flinch when some one speaks abruptly? I wanted to tell you that I understand what is happening to you. Has your body gotten used to the pain of his anger? Does your soul seem hollow; does your spirit feel weak? I am here to tell you, I understand.

 I know what its like to be afraid of your own shadow. I remember feeling so lost and isolated, that I would pray for God to just let me fall asleep forever. I know you feel like life is hopeless…I am here to tell you it isn’t.

 Let me tell you about him. He is not as strong as he wants you to believe. There is nothing wrong with you…your inner strength is why you are still here. What he has done to you is inexcusable…he is weak. Real men don’t need to hit women. Love is not taken from women…it is given freely. God did not create you for another person to batter or abuse. I know it all seems hopeless…but you are not alone. He doesn’t want you to have friends, because you will be exposed to REAL love…and he needs to control you. He doesn’t want you having relationships with your family, because they will try to stop him. He needs to have you all to himself…so he can tear at your self esteem…and then spoon feed you pseudo compliments, so he comes across like a knight in shining armor. In truth, he is no knight….but a court jester…he is a joke…except no one is laughing. Of course he wants you to dress drab…at this point he cant take a chance on a real man noticing, how your eyes sparkle when you laugh…or the way sunlight hits your hair. You did not cause him to hurt you, no matter what he says.

 Know that no matter what he tells you, God loves you. You are a beautiful person inside and out, and no one can take that from you. I know life has been hard, and finding the strength to get up everyday isn’t easy…but everyday you do it. Everyday you put on your “everything” is fine face…and go about your business. You are the strong one. He is envious of you…because try as he may…he is unable to break you.

 Talk to people, don’t suffer in silence. I know it is scary to walk away…but remember you are walking towards a better future. Please know that if you stay, nothing will get better. His behavior will only escalate. You have to survive. And in your survival, you will be able to reach out to another woman, like I am reaching out to you. You will be able to tell her that she is not alone and there is always hope. Please long as you are breathing…hope exists.