Tag Archive: family



To all the beautiful people
Remember that today is tomorrows memory
Remember that even the darkness needs the LIGHT to exist
Remember that once someone had to be patient with you
That love is not a thing u do…but WHO u are
Remember that instead of seeking that perfect mate
Be that PERFECT YOU
Everything and everyone is not for you…
And that is okay
Love with your whole heart
You will never be disappointed
Love never fails…
Failure is an illusion
You have already won
The only war that you are fighting is against yourself
Today…
Choose YOU
Remember that our Creator would not create you…
With the intention for you to lose
But I will remind you that when we see negative things in others
It is only because we see them in ourselves
People are a mere reflection of how u really see yourself
There will be those who will constantly test you…
That’s okay
It will only make you better
Understand that the light which shines on your face…
With all its warmth and love
Actually came from inside yourself
And always…in all ways KNOW
YOU ARE LOVE…
And I appreciate you all…

How Did YOU Help?


I watched a video recently
It was a little girl who was talking to her brother about his greatness
She was loving and kind…
At one point she says…
You are a star…and you shine
At that moment you saw the dark clouds lift from him
And he develops this most contagious smile
Self love is usually something that we believe we all have
And we should have it…
But too often…
We are looking for someone else to legitimize who we are
We are searching for Mr Right
While we become…Ms. RightNow
Self love is not about an ego out of control
It is about acknowledgement
Its about acceptance
It is about being comfortable in your own skin
NO matter what your skin looks like
And it does NOT mean that you look better than someone else
And everytime I hear that type of chatter
I cannot help but to wonder why a person would have so much self loathing
You see if you are comfortable with who you are…
You would only want the very best for others…
You would smile at their accomplishments…
Not sit around watching for them to fall
Arrogance is not necessary…
If you REALLY understand who YOU are
YOU have your own light
Don’t use it to blind someone …
Use it to guide them…
Don’t use it to point out other peoples flaws
Use it to appreciate the very ALL-ness of them
Learn to love ALL people
Understand that we all have a history…
A story to tell
And just because ours are not the same…
Does not mean that yours is less important than mine
Find forgiveness for yourself…
And when u look at that person
The one who you talk about negatively…
Find yourself in them…
Seek your Creator in all things…
Talk to everyone as if you are praying for yourself
And remember at the end of this life cycle
It is very likely we will be asked
How did YOU help…
I love you all

I’m Not Strong Enough


 

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In about 3 weeks, on January 4th…
It will be 5 years since my sister left this place.
It always leaves me feeling like she JUST left
Over and over again
And during times when I swear I just want to give up
And believe me there are plenty of those…
I remember having a conversation with her once…
Telling me that I should never make apologies for who or what I am
Never let anyone else’s ideas of who you should be…
Taint who you know that you are
For most people the holidays can be happy times
And for some it is sad and depressing…
For me…
Getting past the holiday season is greeted with the fact
That 5 years ago…just after all the decorations and celebrations were over
That cold early morning call came in to me
Jen, mom won’t wake up
I don’t think she is breathing,,,
There is NOTHING…
NOTHING…
That can prepare you for THAT kind of heartache
She was strong…
The most beautiful kind of strong
And while I, often, quite desperately
Try to recall our millions of conversations
There is only one that tends to stand out…
When I was very ill…
Just waking from a coma
She came to see me…
She grabbed my hand and smiled
Her blue eyes sparkling…
I knew you would be okay
How could you have known that?
I am not strong enough to live without you
God will have to take me first…
And so it was…
Please make the most of your moments
Those that you are certain will be here no matter what
Won’t
Those phone calls you have put off until tomorrow
Those visits to the family that KNOW U LOVE THEM
Make those calls and visits…
There is nothing worse than
A life filled with regret and sorrow
So during this holiday…
Hold your loved ones close
I love you all

Where Does Your Mind Go


Where does your mind go when you aren’t busy ?
What catches your eye ?
What made the first tear fall ?
Are u afraid to die ?
How much of your life
Is spent forgetting to live ?
Is it really better to receive
And harder to try and give ?
Who is that special lady ?
Whose spirit leads to that thought ?
Is your soul intact…
Or has it in fact…been bought?
What makes your heart jump
Who makes your day brighter
Who eases your mind
And makes your load lighter?
Whomever or whatever
Takes your core to the next level
Know that it is you…whom I love
And will gladly do it…forever

The Truth


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The Truth

In 2014, one year ago today.

Over 200 African girls were kidnapped while at school

The world seemed to gasp in fear and disbelief

But slowly, other new stories flogged our air waves

And eventually the thought of those innocent children

Would begin to fade away

We became concerned about Ebola

We mourned the death of Robin Williams

We became suspicious of Bill Cosby

Bobbi Kristina’s life became a headliner

And the United States was devastated by the Ferguson injustice

But in the meantime in AFRICA

The families of these 200 girls

Pleaded

Cried

Screamed

And missed

200 Missing school girls

To the media…possibly

They were just a number to be read

Perhaps they were just a statistic to be reported

Just another story to try to destroy

Our spirit

It made me weak every time I read about them

Were they even alive

We asked 6 months later

And a year later…

The chatter about their lives

Has stopped

As if these beautiful girls didn’t deserve more than

A few months of discussion

The media says we cannot handle more than one

Strong news story at a time

The media says we shouldn’t care AS MUCH

For people that do not live next door

And that would be the problem …wouldn’t it?

We rarely REALLY care about the children next door

Our thoughts are tied up in us

How we feel

Our situation

Our Pain

Our disappointments

Just think of how loved we would feel

If our Creator only thought of the needs needed for him/her

Where would the LIGHT come from

How would the LOVE change?

If we could start to think differently

Our reality would drastically evolve

And we wouldn’t have to be fed hand outs

From the news outlets

We could genuinely care about women mourning the loss of their daughters

Without judging their way of life

Without deciding all that she could have done better

If we could achieve personal harmony and peace

We could just hold the hand of one of those mothers

Look her in the eyes…

And say…I know

I know you are hurting

I know your heart is breaking

I know you feel all alone

And if you are able…

Look at her as a sister

Love her…without expectation

You might be surprised at how that love

Comes barreling back at you

I cannot imagine

What is was like to live with the horror

That those families have had to endure

And no matter what anyone says

No one deserved that fate

Seek answers… NO

Seek THE TRUTH

1500 Days


1500 Days

 

1500 days ago I experienced my FIRST REAL heartbreak.

1500 days ago was the first time I had noticed this emptiness in my heart.

1500 days ago was the last time her phone would call my house.

1500 days ago all our plans for the future, together, vanished.

1500 days ago…I started crying.

And all of these are true. But also:

1500 days ago I became thankful for just having known her.

1500 days ago I felt the need to share her with the world.

1500 days ago my moments with her became memories.

1500 days ago…life became more precious than silver or gold.

1500 days ago I learned how strong I REALLY am.

You see, 1500 days ago, she left this place. It was unexpected…but soon became reality.

And while the tears will still find me and often catch me off guard; I know she suffers no more.

I know that she is safe and no one can ever again cause her harm.

1500 days ago I became humbled…at how very fragile life can be.

And while I miss my sister, like nothing I have ever experienced, I know her love lifts me up.

I know she is watching over me and my family…smiling.

And sometimes when a tear rolls down my cheek unexpectedly…I swear I can feel her hand wipe it away.

So on this 1500th day…I celebrate life, love and an amazing woman.

So 1500 days later, she still makes me smile…when I think of her.

And my gift to you, on this 1500th day…embrace life.

Take no moment for granted.

Say, YES I CAN.

Then DO.

Take advantage of every opportunity you have in this life, to create a chain of hope.

Link with people…who may have given up.

Shine your light all over humanity.

Love everyone…especially YOURSELF.

You have to be strong…the world will test you.

And while I wouldn’t wish my 1500th day on ANYONE…

I made it…I am still here.

We have work to do…

For even on my 1500th day…

I love you still!

The Storm


The Storm

 

I have written and spoken many times about Domestic Violence. This is something that I, personally, survived. I know there are some people that may want me to be quiet about it and there are others that may NEED me to be quiet about it. But the problem with this is that I dream of a world where women don’t have to hide their faces in social media. I dream of a time and place where women don’t have to hide bruises or make excuses for a man that has no self-control.

Whether this is a world that you are unaware of or if it’s a life that you have and are trying to keep quiet…here is my message to you:

I survived a difficult cycle in my life…but there are others that are experiencing it and have no voice. I will continue to speak out on this, because whether it fits into our ideas about who a person “really” is or not…this behavior exists. Unless you have been through this, I don’t even think you could fathom what that life is like. And if any of us want this behavior swept under the rug or would prefer that it is not spoken on here or on our radio show…I am left to wonder why?

Everything in the darkness always comes to light…no doubt about that; even if that light is only there to show us who we really are.

Abuse comes in all sizes and shapes, all races, creeds and religions; we cannot think that because a woman doesn’t come forward when WE think she should…if she comes forward at all, that it isn’t true. There is nothing as tormenting as hiding behind bushes hoping that you won’t be seen. There is nothing quite like…fearing nighttime. There is nothing like being afraid everywhere you go…no one should have to live that way…yet there are those of us who will tell you…that struggle is very real.

I will not minimize it or make it seem “not THAT bad” to make another person more comfortable. What happened to me and so many other women should be screamed from the rooftops…only then will this learned behavior stop.

There is nothing like the damage that abuse does to you. It leaves scars and we carry those scars forever. We forever carry around the weight that those types of experiences taint our souls with. It is one thing to survive it…that in itself is miraculous…because too many of us aren’t lucky enough to escape and others of us are too afraid to try but it is quite another to have to break the cycle. The real struggle is when we find real love…that everlasting love and we are so busy watching for cues and clues of abuse that we destroy the innocent in our lives. Of course, that is the point of abuse, to destroy us for another person. I beg of you to not let that happen. I know it isn’t easy. Bruises are so much simpler to hide and heal than a soul that has been tortured.

I will forever speak out against this horrific life cycle. I may make people uncomfortable, but if that is the case…maybe we should ask ourselves …why? Why do you, I or anyone need this swept under the rug? Are we sick of hearing about it or are we hiding who we really are? Are we speaking out of line with the people in our lives? Calling one another names…belittling one another. Is this the best that we can do? Would silencing me make things easier?

Unfortunately silencing me will not change anything…and too many of my sisters are being battered and broken, by people that claim to love them. The time for awakening is now. We don’t have time to sit around and try to figure out why he hits, pushes, slaps, punches, or verbally assaults her. We have no more time to try to find an understanding about why he holds her captive monetarily. While I hope these individuals get the help that they need…it is not the victims place to try and FIX him…because you didn’t break him. Sometimes we have to love people from afar.

As for myself, I will continue to speak out against anyone…male or female that abuses another human being. No one should have to live this way and hiding from it …changes nothing. If you are a man or woman in this situation…speak out…you have a voice. You are not alone…reach out.

For all others that have requested that I silence my thunder…the storm is just beginning…buckle up.

I wish you all light and love.

http://www.blogtalkradio.com/mrol

 

~LM Young

It’s You


Some days are better
And some are much worse
But when you look for blessings
Instead of the curse…
The sun beams warmer
Your smile is brighter
After all who gets more loving
The lover or the fighter ?
Embrace every challenge
Be led by your ancestors chant
Speak only of positivity
No more talk of I can’t
Rise up freedom fighters
And uplift others too
No matter how dark the dawn seems
The answer to someone’s prayers…
Is you
LM Young

To My Sister


To My Sister

 

 

I was thinking about the day the Doctor told me I had Cervical Cancer.

The ground shifted under my feet; did she say Cancer? No, there must be a mistake. I just went in for a checkup a few days before…life was normal. Did she say cancer? No, she has me confused with someone else. Things like this don’t happen to me.

I must have looked at her like she was speaking in a foreign language, because she just looked back and didn’t utter a word. I felt her touch the top of my hand…I snatched it back, as if she sent an electric charge through my skin.

No, don’t console me. She was wrong. Do I look like a cancer patient? No. I do everything right. I am kind to people. I watch what I eat. I exercise. I pray. Things like this aren’t supposed to happen to people like me. I kept muttering to myself…what did I do wrong? I spoke a little too loudly. She responded as if I were asking her the question. She said there is often no explanation as to what causes a woman to start producing cancerous cells. Did she say cancer, again? I shook my head in disbelief…will someone make her stop saying that?

She asked if someone was with me, because we needed to discuss treatments.

Of course no one was with me…this was just a checkup, I thought to myself. Treatment, did she say treatment? Ummm, how do we get rid of it? I asked softly.

She smiled. “Why was she smiling?”

There is no cure for cervical cancer. No cure?

Okay, yeah, I knew that. Breathe…don’t forget to breathe. Do not pass out. I asked her, “Why do I have Cancer”? She gave me the generic, “there is no way to know why exactly”. She went on about genetics, diet, and other contributing factors, but wrapped it up by telling me that it may be none of the above. Why did I ask dumb questions? I knew all of this.

“Wait, am I going to die?” I almost couldn’t see her expression, blinking through my own tears. We are going to try and get it under control before we have to think about that.

Try? Breathe…don’t forget to breathe, Wait, don’t breathe too hard…you are going to start hyperventilating. It’s going to be okay, but you have to get a grip on your emotions, right now.

She started telling me that she wanted to try and freeze the cells…but the disease was too progressive. We have to do a biopsy; to see exactly what we are dealing with. My mind started spinning. How did I get to this place?

Two weeks before, I was in a car accident. For the most part, all of my injuries seemed superficial. My face was severely bruised, so much so, that on my first doctor’s visit; the nurse asked me if I was a domestic violence victim. Both of my eyes were black and blue. My face was swollen, and my lip was cut open, too. There were bruises on my thighs, ribs, and across both of my breasts.

It was the bruising on my breasts, which prompted me to visit my OB/GYN. I wanted make sure there were no lumps or anything like that since I hit the dashboard so hard.

The Doctor asked me if I wanted a pap smear while I was there. I can recall thinking, no. But for whatever reason, I said yes.

Two weeks later, there I was…living with cancer. My doctor said there was no telling how long I had actually had it. She said it could have been dormant in my system for a while, and the accident could have jarred something in me…causing it to spread.

How could I go home and explain everything that my doctor just told me? I had Cancer. I kept saying it over and over again as I got in the car. I thought if I said it enough, by the time I got home, I would be able to say it without crying.

I decided, instead of going straight home, I would go to see you. I needed a safe place to go, where I could fall apart…just for a minute. I just needed a minute. I kept praying all the way to your apartment…please, God…let me have this one minute.

I barely remember you answering the door. I just remember falling into you. You were confused. You kept touching my face, looking for a new injury. You were talking so fast that I couldn’t answer you. My mouth wouldn’t move. Finally, I told you that my doctor said that I had Cervical Cancer, and I just fell apart.

You kept saying NO…over and over again. You were crying so hard; I could no longer determine who was consoling whom. I told you that unless the treatments worked, before it started spreading further, I might die. Somehow, you mustered up all of this strength and told me that was NOT going to happen.

You were an angel to me in that moment. You went with me to tell mom. It was no longer me having Cancer, but us having it. During the entire ordeal, your faith and strength never wavered; you continued to be the glue that kept me together.

You were my anchor during every pivotal moment in my life. You encouraged me, laughed with me, and let me lean on you.

And then there was silence.

I don’t think I ever thanked you enough. I don’t think I ever told you I loved you…enough. I will regret that for the rest of my life. I will regret everything we didn’t do, and all things we didn’t get a chance to say.

I love you…and I know you are living pain free so I know I must sound selfish…I am sorry.

I just miss you so much…

 

Love,

Me

 

If You Ever


If You Ever

If you ever fall in love

Let it be in her eyes

The way they sparkle

Stars in a midnight sky

If you ever fall in love

Let it be the way she smiles

Like no one has ever seen

You be loved in quite a while

If you ever fall in love

Notice the tears she drops

And hold her heart always

In fact don’t ever stop

If you ever fall in love

Tell her every day

She is the one

She is the way

If you ever fall in love

It’s something you would miss

And perhaps you would desire

To write a poem such as this

                           ~LM Young

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