Tag Archive: rape

I am Waging War

I am Waging War

I am waging war

I am putting down my mark

Against private wars against women

Which leave scars upon our hearts

A female journalist said

Don’t drink you won’t be raped

She even believing the lies

Leading to gender hate

A politician was quoted

Not saying it was her fault but…

Please Mister Government

That really is enough

We have allowed women

And their body parts to be used

As insults for our sons

Another form of abuse

You hit like a girl men yell

An insult for a boy

See we teach hate young

Leaving both sexes feeling a void

IF we teach our wonderful sons

That a female is a curse

Is it any wonder his opinion

Of women is the worst?

We are not only breeding hatred

Within our sons who are so young

But our daughters hate themselves

MY GOD…what have we done?

She feels she is unworthy

Maybe the assault was my fault

Please forgive us FATHER

This behavior has to stop

Remember the sluts that you talk of

Some ones daughter…someone’s mother

Of the sins we bathe in

When we fail to love one another

Please before it goes further

Weigh your words…they can be deadly

The time for forgiveness is now

Don’t you think the world is ready?

Ready to stand up for its sisters

Ready to speak out on her beauty

Yes…upward and onward

It’s our job…no OUR DUTY

Yes, I am waging war

I will no longer be idle

And you can call me one name

QUEEN is my title

So if you feel you have the urge

To spout negativity from afar

Go ahead I am ready…

I am waging war

Rape Is Never Okay

Rape is Never Okay

Asked to High School kids

When is rape okay

The answers that I found

Left my heart in dismay

If she drinks too much

If he dated her a lot

If at first she said yes

Then later decided not

If he was so sexually charged

He couldn’t stop proceeding

Rape is never okay

What evil are we breeding?

If she had sex with another

If she was drunk or high

Our kids say it’s okay

Shouldn’t we wonder why?

We make excuses for the rapist

She must have done something wrong

She must have been a worthless tease

Methodically turning him on

Now she cries rape?

And is blaming that poor guy

He is a victim…just ask the courts

Still don’t wonder why?

Why does it go unreported?

Why don’t more get arrested?

Maybe we should take a closer look

Let’s get a little more invested

She will be placed on trial

Why were you out so late

Why did you wear THAT dress

Oh…he was your date?

Laughter under the breath

Allegations of immoral acts

Not talking about…what ifs

I only deal with the facts

She will be dissected

His intention never posed

What about justice?

That book is now closed

What is the lesson I am teaching

What reality are we facing

The time to save humanity…short

Our life clocks are racing

Talk to your children

Don’t stop until they REALLY understand

Sex is about intimacy

Not something they should demand

Children learn from us

Place respect in their vision

So when these situations arise

They make the right decision

Rape isn’t an occurrence

That feeling never goes astray

It hurts and sometimes kills

Not a game that is played

It isn’t a decision to be made

It isn’t about a relationship on fire

It isn’t about her changing her mind

Or your uncontrollable desire

Rape is about violence

Nothing more nothing less

If we think it is okay

We are not doing our best

Protect the victims yet to be had

Protect the minds of our young

And protect the future

Lives of those who’ve just begun

It’s alright to say no


Next time you’ll know

Rape is never…ever okay


When Is Rape Okay

When Is Rape Okay

When Is Rape Okay

Yesterday I saw a post on Facebook. I went to the author’s website and found (just for clarification); that when these high school students were asked to answer the questions, it was on a rating scale 0-5. Zero equaled not agreeing at all, therefore symbolic of “NO”. Any rating over zero, would be counted as a “yes”. I just wanted that to be clear before I wrote this, although I don’t think that the number on the scale that each child chose, above zero matters. Allow me just this courtesy…RAPE IS WRONG.

This post had me thinking, past the lump I felt in my throat. I was disappointed in the fact that these young males felt this way; for any man to think it would ever be okay to force sex upon another.  What I found deeply disturbing was that any female would think this behavior was acceptable; why would we think that any situation would make this horrible and vile act appropriate?

Beyond talking to our children about the dangers of strangers; what do we teach them? Do we teach our sons that it is NEVER okay to force anyone to have sex? Or do we think that the logic is implied? At this point, we can effectively come to the conclusion that it is not. Where are our daughters getting their education from? Why would anyone of our young women think that she has no say over her body? Where is the self-respect and honor? Where would our sons develop the mentality that they EVER have the right to force sex on another person?

This posting had my heart feeling heavy. If I learned nothing from the rape of the Steubenville, Ohio teen; I learned that far too many people think that when a woman is drunk or high…that consent is implied, even if she is unable to say no.

To the young men and women who answered “yes”; by responding that it was okay for a man to force a woman to have sex if:

1. He spends a lot of money on her

2. He is so turned on he doesn’t think he can stop

3. She is drunk or stoned

4. She has had sex with others

5. They have dated for a long time

6. She wanted to, but then changed her mind

Allow me to share something with you, rape cannot be changed. Rape is not one moment on a random day/night; rape lasts your entire life. You never forget the feeling of degradation. You never forget the questions that your mind poses, that will never have an answer. Rape is far reaching…no matter what anyone says.

Anytime someone tells you that rape isn’t THAT bad…they are lying. It destroys lives and can permanently destroy the hearts and souls of men and women.

As parents, it is our responsibility to arm our children with the knowledge of love. Respect must be taught…through observation. Our children are watching what we say, do and respond to; our speech must be kind and loving. Keep in mind, we teach our children callousness.

As for these young women, who also participated in this “poll”?

Love yourselves. No one has the right to force sex on you. Respect your body and your decisions; do what is right for you. You do not owe anyone anything; your body is sacred.

We need to change the rules, so we can change our frame of mind. If she/he does not say YES…the answer is no. If she/he says yes, then changes his/her mind…the answer is no. Paying for a meal, present or any other such thing…does NOT purchase him/her sexually. If you are so turned on that you don’t think you can stop…don’t even start. NO matter how long you have known him and no matter what your relationship is…it is always your decision to make.

We must do better. We are assisting in the demise of these young souls, by sitting in silence. We must take a pro-active role in the lives of these young people, who are our future. Rape is not a phase that someone goes through…it is a felony.

Remember my friends, rape is a crime that destroys. Talk to your sons and daughters; do not make excuses, like those made for the rapists in the Jane Doe case in Ohio. Stop placing the victim on trial, when we do this…we are embracing the sexual predator.

While no one wants to think their child is a predator, when we sweep such behavior under the rug…we are breeding it.

Love one another…and please…please stop the insanity.

We Are All Jane doe

We Are All Jane Doe

A crime often misrepresented

A woman under assault

Society telling her

It must have been her fault

Why did you wear those clothes

Why did you go to that place

What made you drink so much

Verbal assaults can’t be erased

She is the victim/ survivor

She managed to stay strong…be tough

She didn’t realize her protection

Would be treating her so rough

 A tear slides down her cheek

She must have done something wrong

She is cheap, easy…a drunk

She simply doesn’t belong

She stole his bright future

She brought negativity to our town

Never mind the sexual assault

Or when the “hero” threw her down

Never mind that she said no

Or worse…she didn’t say yes

Never mind the invasion made

To get a simple arrest

You are mad her name isn’t displayed

What…her wounds aren’t severe enough

Would your harsh accusations exist

If Jane Doe was someone you loved

Jane I understand it now

I know your pain is real

I too…have been tainted

I sadly know how you feel

The empty hollow feeling

The silent tears you shed

What good is survival

When they wish you were dead

I know the hand slaps you received

Shame on your behavior…you

Shouldn’t have tempted him so

While you ask…what did I do?

The truth …be it told

No matter what anyone will say

She was a victim who survived

And shouldn’t be treated this way

She was robbed of her virtue

And no matter what clothes she wore

Regardless of how late she was out

Whether she drank or she swore

She is a child of God

Protected by his Grace

No one has the right

To steal her sacred place

So my friends I implore you

Stop victimizing her again

She is someone’s daughter

She didn’t deserve this end

Stand up and speak out

Tell everyone one you know

Rape is NEVER okay

And we are ALL Jane Doe


To My Children

To My Children

Be careful who you speak to

And where you do go

Don’t drink too much

Double check your clothes

Guard your reputation

People may think less of you

You have to think ahead

No matter what you do

We teach this to our daughters

Making sure to instill caution

A long listing of things

Causing mental exhaustion

We have to protect her

When all is said and done

Understandable but…

What about our sons

Do not disrespect women

Because it must be so

No matter what anyone says


Be a great man

It’s your victory call

Lift no hand in anger

Respect women…all

You may be frustrated

You may feel sinister

But would you allow another

To hurt your sister

Let’s call for annihilation

Of two different rules

We all have minds and hearts

Let’s use these tools

To my children I beg you

Always be prepared

Some actions are so vile

Lives can’t be repaired

**Jane Doe….I hear you**

To My Children

Be careful who you speak to

And where you do go

Don’t drink too much

Double check your clothes

Guard your reputation

People may think less of you

You have to think ahead

No matter what you do

We teach this to our daughters

Making sure to instill caution

A long listing of things

Causing mental exhaustion

We have to protect her

When all is said and done

Understandable but…

What about our sons

Do not disrespect women

Because it must be so

No matter what anyone says


Be a great man

It’s your victory call

Lift no hand in anger

Respect women…all

You may be frustrated

You may feel sinister

But would you allow another

To hurt your sister

Let’s call for annihilation

Of two different rules

We all have minds and hearts

Let’s use these tools

To my children I beg you

Always be prepared

Some actions are so vile

Lives can’t be repaired

**Jane Doe….I hear you**




My body does not give permission

Nor allow it to be so

No matter what we are told now


My body is my own

I have no regard for those who

Say I didn’t fight enough

So I must have wanted to

Rape is not a dime store toy

It’s a cruelty beyond words

And anyone who says else

Is simply absurd

I didn’t really fight enough?

My body…mind needs to shut down

Wonder if such statements would be made

If YOUR life was turned upside down

Do you understand the torment

Do you understand the fear

After living with a rape

The last thing we need to hear

If she asked for it

Or she didn’t hit hard enough

She isn’t a victim

Maybe she likes it rough

If it seems I am being unkind

Or if my heart is being twisted

I will tell you I know a God

Who said…no…insisted

I be treated with respect

I am deemed as a Queen

Protected by a Creator

Who understands what I mean

When I say this one more time

NO matter who tells you so

In the instance of RAPE

No means NO

**My poem today is in response to a Superior Court Justice’s remarks about a rape case**



To my readers…rape is a horrendous crime…not to be taken lightly. It takes so much courage to come forth and report this crime…PLEASE do not victimize her twice



I wish you all Peace



Today I want to tell you

Simply avert your attention

To something women go through

Almost too horrible to mention

But it happens more often than

Is spoken above her silence

It’s a terminal illness

It’s called domestic violence

That’s a basic term though

Doesn’t make it too clear

It’s about the physical and emotional

It’s about living in constant fear

Fear for yourself and your kids

For people you love no doubt

He will kill them all and

It’s that fear we are talking about

Fear to look up and

Fear to say a word

Fear to tell anyone

The things that you heard

Fear has its own life span

It can live longer than we

I know because one time

The fear almost killed me

Domestic Violence is a crime

Someone is stealing a dream

He is beating her pride

Molesting her self esteem

He is bruising her face

Breaking her fragile bones

Destroying all she ever had

For her…he thinks he owns

But ownership is not his

In fact this slavery can thrive

When we would rather find death

Than to suffer more alive

Do you know who she is

At least someone you suspect

You kind of sort of know

Just don’t want to say so yet

I’m here to tell you now

Later might be too vast

Her sand is draining out

Of life’s hour glass

Speak up she needs your help

For even if you love him

They both need to get help

To stop the rage within

We all want to claim ignorance

When the outcome of death arrives

But we failed to step up when

Both parties were still alive

Whether you love him or her

Or are just doing what is needed

Here is my sage advice

I hope you carefully heed it

He is killing her no question

The children are watching too

Someone needs to step up

Today that someone is you


Rise up to the challenge

Be the saver of this story

It’s about saving humanity

Not self-proclaimed glory

This is my Domestic Violence lesson

Sometimes we just need to be aware

That our women and children are dying

I’m asking that you be there

It’s not about butting in

It’s not about prying

It’s about humanity

Please stop it from dying

So make that call now

Before she withers away

Give her hope of a future

Tell her it starts today

Spread humanity I beg you

Reach out by reaching up

Give her strength to scream

Today I have had enough

October is Domestic Violence Awareness month…it exists…too many women are painfully AWARE…please help

1-800-621-HOPE (4673)


Let’s take further examination
Of this gender assault
Why when it comes to rape
Why do we assume it is her fault

Some will say I’m wrong
To make such a claim
But if you saw through my eyes
You would say the same

We live in a society of people
Where the “B” word is glammed
Saying this is what you are
But it’s not who I am

Music and movies
Throw the term up in lights
But I’m up today saying
It is NOT alright

We make it cool to demean women
Saying it is only just a word
But the ignorance of that statement
Is just simply absurd

Okay so back to my topic
Yes…rape is a crime
So why must SHE stand on trial
Every single time

Why is her behavior attacked
Why is her clothing critiqued
Why do we claim that the man
Is a victim…he is weak

Why is she criticized for bathing
Scrubbing him off of her skin
What…not enough bruising?
You should examine from within

For this child of God
The “B” word to some
Just went out for a drink
Just to have some fun

So why wasn’t he asked a question
What were you doing out so late
Who gave you permission
To force sex on a date

Why not ask him why he showered
After making this intrusion
The idea of REAL justice
Just another man made illusion

How do I know that it’s so
How can I be certain of this
Let’s just say I don’t need to assume
Because I know how it is

Not only is her body degraded once
But will be once again
When she is put under a microscope
By family and friends

And don’t forget a court system
Which claims to seek the truth
But it isn’t what you know
Only…what you can prove

I”m back to the “B” word again
I just can’t bring myself to repeat
The vile words used for women
By almost eveyone we meet

But the relationship is obvious
But I don’t mind shining some light
When we make demeaning women okay
We are saying rape is alright

No, you don’t agree?
I can see you are alarmed
You don’t find the word as evil
As sexual acts which cause harm?

If that is the case
You just made my job simple
To attack my name is as wrong
As assaulting my body…a temple

Am I making too much bother
About something you would not do?
Be aware my good brother
The world is watching you

You may not call her a name
Or sexually invade her space
But there are women you know
That could take her place

Do you care now?
Does it bother you more?
To think about your daughter…mother
Or the sweet girl next door

When we allow our fellow man
To make excuses for such acts
We submissively saying …okay
I have no problem with that

So I am asking you to be real
When “The Boys” are hanging around
Be the example that they need
Not just a face in a crowd

For when we allow this to happen
Foul acts and fouler names
We create a cycle of bitterness
Where the scars always remain

Be the voice of a Creator
Which screams NO MORE
Become the  watcher of HIS sheep
What you were created for

Think twice about your words
And those of others too
Stand up…be strong
Your path is waiting for you

Your Cup Has Run Over

Your Cup Has Run Over

  My cup; it runs over. This is a true sentence. If we give it much thought; we would have to agree. This does not say that the cup is only filled with rainbows and unicorns; but that my blessings are bountiful.

  I have led a very balanced life, while it was not always filled with wine and roses; it was always filled with love. Love is a funny thing; when we are going through tough times; we may say that we are not loved. We can develop the mindset that love equals “smooth sailing”.

  For me, love is not the equivalent of smooth sailing. Allow me to give you an example; if you are punished as a child for telling a lie; do your parents still love you? If you fall off of the skateboard that you were told not to ride, breaking your arm; are you still loved? If your 20 year marriage ends in a messy divorce; does this mean that you were cheated out of love?

  We are constantly given love. It may be strongest when we are told “NO”; as opposed to when we are met with no disagreement.

  Things in this life can be difficult; but why do we make them unbearable?

  If I am told, by a source greater than I, to hold some sand; what does that mean? Initially I may hold out my hand and let the sand fall into it, as I create a cup from my palm, to hold it safely. My thought process being that; surely I would not be asked to hold more than a handful of sand. When the sand continues to pour into my hand; until it is overflowing and I have to use my other hand, who is at fault? Suppose both hands are full and over flowing; we are forced to begin filling the sand with a bowl. As the bowl gets fuller; we realize that we need a bucket, barrel, or even a dump truck.

  What was the point of this? We were not created with boundaries. I was not told that I would only be given enough sand to fill one hand; I made that assumption. I decided what my limitations were. I, who was created from an infinite Source, decided that I would only be asked to hold as much…as I saw fit.

  This same is true when we are met with adversity. We decide that we are not supposed to have to suffer. We decide how much is too much, for us. Just as with the handfuls of sand, we grow anxious and agitated; when our own self imposed limitations have been over run.

  How can we, after all, KNOW how much that we can take? We are limitless. We are not bound to the borders and lines that we have created ourselves. We are only bound with the limitations that were given from birth.

  The truth is that we were given NO limitations. Do we ever say, I have more happiness than I can handle; can you take some back? NO, of course we don’t. Why? We have decided what we WANT to handle; and we made it law.

  In my life I have known hardships; I have heard some say that it wasn’t fair. I was somehow cheated into carrying around the weight of several people. The truth is though; you, nor I, can determine how much…is too much.

  If we allow ourselves to be of the mindset that we have limits; then we will always feel defeated. There is a higher purpose for all things; but we may not know what that purpose is, until we are met with them. For instance, we may think that we could never handle being homeless. But if that were a REAL limitation; why would there be so many homeless people? Rape or domestic violence may seem like a limitation; so how would we explain the numbers of survivors, who have lived to tell their stories? Why do people with Cancer, Lupus, Diabetes, kidney disease, patients on dialysis; live? Surely those impairments are more than we should have to handle. Yet there are people who live with these diseases and situations…every day.

  My cup, it runs over. I am given and accept all of my challenges, in this life. I stand straight and strong, in the wake of a storm. I will not allow MY WILL to defeat me. I am not owned by a disease, simply because man says I should be. I am not defeated by a situation, such as abuse, simply because people have said that it must be unbearable. I am supported and carried; by a love that is deeper and longer than anything that man can decide is TOO much, for me.

  Even in the middle of a disaster; I am loved higher than, any anguish I have suffered. This does not mean that people who are abused; or have endured great pain, aren’t actually suffering. It only means that my limitations are not determined, by me, or anyone else. I will take all I can take; until my body can no longer withstand it.

  In any regard, the sand will always overflow your HUMAN hand. We will always be met with challenges. We just have to understand and appreciate that with these challenges; we will also have realized our TRUE strength.

  Stop counting the travesties of your life, they are a fraction of the total experiences that you have had. Blessings are given daily; every moment of this life, is something to be grateful for.

  Today I challenge you; count every blessing that you experience. It may be hard, because we have developed the mind state that we deserve to have certain things. We may feel that we deserve to breathe, to walk, to speak, to hear; but the truth is; that we deserve nothing. Yet we are given certain blessings anyway.

  Count your blessings today; and at the end of the day…let’s see how many times; your cup has run over.

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