Tag Archive: relationships


The Illusion


The Illusion

 

Often, I think we can take our loved ones for granted. We may even feel or think that we were “due” these relationships. While I cannot imagine what we could do to deserve or earn these crowned accomplishments…it does appear to be the case, even if only in the minds of a select few.

We were gifted moments with our loved ones. We can often become so comfortable with what we appear to have with them, that we forget that these moments were never “given” and were never intended to be permanent. Intentionally or not, we develop a sense of entitlement and this becomes dangerous.

People are not possessions and while we may love them in a very human way; human love comes with stipulations, quite often. Human love is relationship oriented. “I will love you, as long as you don’t…” It is companionship love and can also be a beautiful thing. Anytime we try to grasp something and hold onto it in that way; like most caged birds…it will long to fly away.

When the moments we were gifted become grief…life can begin to look glum. We may become angry and become withdrawn. While this happens often, it is important to try and understand that: Those moments, which have now evolved into memories, are still gifts. You see the fact that the people attached to those moments were ever within our grasp…is a fallacy. Those people, our loved ones who have passed, never belonged to us. They willfully stayed in our lives, for whatever period of time or space. They chose to be a part of our millions and millions of moments, while we are visiting this place.

While we may grow sad or angry that we cannot make more moments with their physical presence; do not allow that bitterness to cause you to turn away from life and the love that is still here for you. The moments that we have been gifted are intended to create a foundation for other relationships. I am often reminded of the very loving nature of our Creator; when I am provided the opportunity to look back at the memories that I have been gifted in my life. As humans, we can become very selfish and want those times, events, relationships to stay just as they are; but just as the world keeps moving…so must we.

We must absorb the love, kindness and joy of these moments and memorialize them in our hearts. And on days when the world seems particularly harsh…we will find that smile from our memory. The smile that we may have taken for granted, years and years ago. And the memory of that archived smile…will lay the foundation for a new smile.

In this way, the people that we grieve…never really leave us. Recently my father in law passed away, and right around the time which he either had just passed or was getting ready to do so…the radio in his van came on while my husband was driving. It didn’t just come on…but it blared so loudly that it shook our insides. Try as he may, my husband was unable to turn that radio down or off…until all of a sudden it turned off all by itself. Now we were told that the radio never worked in the van, but we both experienced it. In our hearts, we know that he was letting us know that we were going to be alright and that he had gone home. We could have made that experience negative, but even after we had learned that he had passed on…the thought of that moment made us smile.

What does all of this mean? It doesn’t mean that we should not miss them or that we shouldn’t grieve. It means that we should appreciate and embrace every moment of every day. I would not wish upon any one the hurt that regret tends to bring. Go to sleep every night with the knowledge that you made the most out of each day; and awake with the thought that today will be better than yesterday. More importantly, do not dwell on all that yesterday wasn’t, or you will bring that same energy into this day.

People that we love will, at one time or another, be called home. Do not allow that knowledge to keep you from opening your heart to that kind of love. When we shield our hearts from pain; we inadvertently shield love from our lives, as well. The most beautiful times in my family occurs when I am sharing the conversations that I had with my grandmother, as a child. It makes my heart feel warm and brilliant. I not only remember her stories and songs, but I can feel her all around me…and I wouldn’t trade that for anything.

There are no guarantees in this life. We were only sent here to realize our purpose and to fulfill it. So while we are here…touch as many hearts as you can.

Exhibit what is called Divine Love.

In this, Divine Love is defined as…that without definition. It cannot be contained or denied. Divine love has no opposition…it simply is. Divine love is what our Creator, gives us. There is nothing to compare it to; it is inclusive of all things…which is where we get the idea of “Allness”. Love all day every day…it takes nothing away from you and your rewards are boundless.

If you exhibit Divine Love in all things…regret cannot exist.

And do not be troubled with the idea of hate…hate is bred out of fear. Even fear can be lessened out of existence…when it is surrounded by love and patience.

We must allow ourselves to let go of the things we are not sure of…similar to letting go of the side of the pool, when we are unsure if we trust ourselves enough to swim toward the center. The water that surrounds us is Divine Love…and if you KNOW TRUE love…you will understand that it never varies. Divine Love never wavers, it is constant and consistent. You are never alone, for you are a part of ALL.

When we allow ourselves to open our hearts to this kind of love…we understand that loss…is an illusion.

 

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Doubt


Doubt

What is the greatest

 Weakness of man

To give a clue…

It’s not of another’s hand

Not love, hate or indifference

Others shout

 It’s ye of little faith…

Those who harbor doubt

It’s that little inner voice saying

I don’t know

Fear of the other voice saying…

I told you so

It’s the fear of the unknown…

Shadows in the dark

Inner self making you

Afraid of who you are

Do not let another single soul

Remove you from your place

They know not of you

Only their own dark space

For when evil comes knocking

Telling us all that we are not

It shows not our shortcomings

But THEIR lives are on the spot

When in doubt seek direction

Let no other man guide you blindly

The truth is never hidden

But you must desire to find it

Doubt not your selves ever

Nor your Creator from on High

For you exist because of He

Doesn’t really matter why

We all have a path which is written

Upon that which we came

Seek Truth…set aside doubt

For Truth is without blame

Love not waste not

For moments are best spent

With love all surrounding

It’s a show stopping event

Doubt not my loved ones

The love which brought us here

Will guide you through all storms

There is nothing but doubt to fear

                                                       ~LM Young


Release

Release into the universe

Release out to the sea

Past relationship woes

Man-made negativities

Release what he or she did

Release the things they said

Don’t feed into the hate

When love needs to be fed

Release the pain and anguish

Release promises not kept

Focus on the journey

It isn’t over yet

Release the weight of your baggage

Set down your emotional sobs

Find the forgiveness you seek

From a most loving God

Release all that now binds you

Let go of feelings from your past

Inhale the light and love

For this will most certainly last

Yes…take this moment

Let go of destructive thoughts

Let me tell you about Forgiveness

And others attributes I’ve brought

Kindness is healing

It is the center of our core

It makes way for our blessings

And I tell you there is more

Empathy is involvement

It says I understand it too

It’s the flowing of love

Saying…this is for you

Joy is the nutrient

Which feeds the souls need

To release all that stunts our growth

In fact…helps us be free

Free of frustration and anger

Free of negative vibes

Freeing a heart broken

Letting the memory subside

The last thing that I brought you

Is love boundless and bright

To show your beauty untapped

When washed in the Light

Release all the dark days

Make room for delight

And see yourself as I do

Beautiful in my sight

**Don’t make the great people in your lives pay for the relationships that didn’t work…these relationships were created to help us grow…stop living there


The Search Is On

 

Why are we always in search of the man/woman that we think will complete us?  Are we not complete, as we are? Wouldn’t it be better if we looked, instead, for someone that complimented who we are now and encouraged us to grow?

When we are seeking something…man, woman or some object of material possession…to complete us; we are searching in vain. No one and nothing can fulfill that need. The most that we may ever be able to hope for is to find someone to walk with us in life; someone that we can grow with.

We shouldn’t place unrealistic expectations on ourselves or on others. Throw away the list of characteristics that you are looking for in a mate. I can only tell you, based on my experience; you may never really know what you need…until your Creator places it right in front of you. We may know what we WANT…but is it a necessity?

This may sound like I am suggesting that you lower your bar of expectation, but I am not. Instead, what I am encouraging you to do is to accept your higher self…and embrace that part of you. Acknowledge your path; the only person that can fulfill that journey…is you. Once you have completely recognized and accepted (who and what) you are; things will be laid in front of you. You won’t have to wonder if he/she is THE ONE; all the answers you seek will become crystal clear.

People place impossible deadlines upon themselves; thinking they must find their TRUE LOVE before a certain age. We must have 2.5 children before a certain age. We must own a home and make a certain amount of money. We even call this idea “success”.  And for some people that may be all they have success with; but I will tell you that I know people that are more successful, more content, and happier than most people that the world calls “successful”.

This happens because they know who they are; and are of the perception which dictates …they will always have exactly what they need, in life. Does this mean they are without struggle? No. But it does mean that the struggle is part of the path.

When we embrace all things…as one thing; the need for one thing over another…disappears. When we realize that our divine connection…is our foundation; we will finally KNOW who and what we are. And that knowledge takes away the need….to have another complete us. We cannot complete other people…we can only support, engage, uplift and grow with…them.

Release the expectations that we have allowed the world to place on us. If we adopt and accept the mindset that we are ONE…even the idea of mother/fatherhood takes on a different meaning. Do you remember, as a child, when your next door neighbor would watch out for you? They might even threaten to tell your mother or father if you misbehaved. These people were not thinking that you were not their biological children…yet the loved you.

When we accept the notion that we are all connected under one sun…by one Creator…regardless of how that Creator is referred; we have acknowledged and accepted our path. We have begun to grow…not only physically, and mentally, but spiritually. This growth will present more opportunities and the world will, literally, open up to us.

 


When Your New Day Starts
Someone wise once told me
The arrogance of the fight
Is not in the challenge but
The decision of who is right
Quite often the sharpness of our tongue
Can start to feel like a blade
Leaving our opponent worn down
From the remarks that we made
Often said my earth angel we tend to forget
About the survival of hope
It’s all we need to get by
It feels we are at the end of our rope
Destroying each others will
Will only lead to rage
Where no one really wins
And first blood is engaged
Is it not better to have a life?
Without all of the grief
Sure victory is sweet
But the taste is so brief
Who doesn’t need hope?
And something to believe in that is greater
And what power is larger
Than the one of Our Creator
So squabble if you have extra time
And no tasks ahead of you
But when you verbally assault God’s children
You will have answering to do
Like what good have you done?
Who did you help in your time?
And those wills that you tested
Those spirits were mine
I tell you your hearts are where
Our Father…he lives
It’s the reason it’s housed
In a cage made of ribs
So when you break the heart of another
As if it can be fixed in a shop
I beg you to wake up
I implore you to stop
For God so loved man that within him
He breathed His air
It’s why God is within us
We can find Him everywhere
So my beautiful brothers and sisters
Go easy on the our ears…our hearts
And recycle the gift of hope
When your new day does start


Our Limit is the Sky

Shouts made in anger
Threats creating fear
Made to be so much worse
When said by someone dear

His words tend to cut
Into the very heart of you
Were there good times…yes
But in comparison…very few

He needs to make you feel
Less than the woman that you are
But not what God wanted for you
As he peers down from the stars

You may want to give up
Just throw up your hands
But I’m telling you not to
Find strength…make a stand

His words while hurtful
Are still not true
He has yet to know
The real woman…which is you

The sad people who hurt us
Trying to cause us pain
Only bring out our inner warrior
Where only light remains

We cannot be defeated
By their negative tone
Because one fact remains true
You are not alone

Any effort which he has made
To break your tender heart
Is only made fruitless by
He who created us from the start

No matter what effects man
Chooses to impose
God knows the path which
Turns a seed into a rose

He knows what is best
For His children one and all
He gives us courage to walk
When we think we can only crawl

Stand up my dear sister
Hold your head high
For our Father walks with you
And while its okay to cry

Know that when your tears
Have dried in the light of His love
You will soar like God’s angels
On the wings of a snowy dove

You have strength and power
Not yet even tapped
It matters not where you have been
Only where you are at

And you are at the feet of God
He will help you rise
For when we submit to His will
Our limit is the sky

But I Love You Anyway


But I Love You Anyway

 

The most difficult lessons we may ever learn, in this life, are the ones that break our hearts. I have personally endured such lessons. I have disappointed people; I have lost people that I love. I, like everyone else, have endured immeasurable grief.

 

When we grieve the death of a loved one, or the death of a relationship; we are not grieving for the one who we lost. We are grieving for ourselves. We are angry, hurt, disappointed and often infuriated; by the fact that; we are left to carry on. We must find a way to keep going; even when our hearts are on fire, with sorrow.

 

Someone I love once told me that when my sister died…it didn’t happen to me. She said that it affected me; and my sorrow was really over the fact that I had to find a way to move on. I didn’t want to believe her; and the fact that she was/is someone who I know wouldn’t hurt me, intentionally; I took the time to listen to her. I was angered by what she said. Of course it happened to me, MY sister died. It was at that point, when she stopped me. She said, “Say that again”. I repeated it was MY sister that died. The point I was trying to emphasize is that she was my sister, not hers; and how dare she say it didn’t happen to me? She said again in the softest voice…she died…you didn’t.

 

Tears started streaming out of my face; seemingly out of nowhere, I saw her point. I had to find the strength to move on; I was left alone to survive. The mere thought of that idea; to this day, makes me cry. I had to decide to move on; I had to decide…every day… to breathe in and out. I found this knowledge disturbing and it hurt. Not that I didn’t want to live; I’m not suicidal. But I wasn’t sure that I wanted to be a part of a world where my sister, my best friend…no longer breathed. I felt abandoned…I felt isolated and I was angry.

 

I felt justified in my anger; no one knew what it was like to love my sister, the way I did. I found a million ways to look at this situation; so that no one could effectively say…I know how you feel. I slowly realized; I created the isolation. People wanted to care; simply because they loved me…and I was hurting.

 

Anger is a funny thing; it can feel so good. Anger can burn longer than any candle you ever light, if we allow it to. Anger can fuel any negative fire that we may come into contact with. Anger will also destroy us.

 

Anger will keep us from forgiving others and it will keep us from being forgiven. Remember what I said in the beginning…everything is a lesson.

 

When we hold on to anger…we are only hurting ourselves. We are blocking our blessings; even when it isn’t our intention.

 

Sometimes I still get angry; when I think about my sister. I will get angry at the mere thought of her leaving me. I have even had conversations about it, with her.

 

But thankfully, I have a most gracious Creator. Even in moments when I feel like I deserve nothing; my Creator shines light on me and says, “But I love you anyway”.

 

We are surrounded by beauty and love; it can be found in everyone and everything.

 

People may say that is just hippy talk; how is a dandelion beauty and love…it is a weed!!

I love these moments. I smile and say, hold out your hands. When empty hands are held out; I will say…using only what is in your hands…make that weed.

 

The beauty and love, even in a dandelion, is the fact that it was created from Greatness. We were all created from Greatness; made to love one another. And when a life cycle ends, on earth, the memories we created with that person…has the miracle of eternal life.

 

There are people on the planet, who were not privileged enough to know my sister. I was blessed by her existence and her memories live through me. People are touched by her; through my writing or speech or actions. Her life truly is eternal.

 

My life was forever changed the day that my sister died. I miss her…every day of my life. There is a void that her death has given me; and I would be lying if I denied that. But it was her time to go Home; and while I don’t think she would have chosen it; she earned it. I know she watches over me now; and I’ m sure she is shaking her head, at times. But the true blessing, is knowing that no matter what I do; which she might not agree with…she will always meet me with an, “But I love you anyway”.

 

And don’t we all deserve those moments?

You


You

The greatest thing ever

I was ever told

Was I am here for you

You are not alone

Such a simple phrase to deliver

So simple to relay

Yet far reaching it is

To give love in this way

A verbally connected hug

A word of unity

A beautiful moment shared

A divine opportunity

You are not alone now

Your cries I hear and know

It’s okay to be afraid

Love starts to grow

For the true essence of love

Is not in a ceremonial ring

But in the unity of a people

And the comfort that brings

You are not alone in your anguish

Your breaking heart is my key

That you are seeking understanding

Fellowship…humanity

Your situation may be unique

Of that we both know to be true

But the isolation you feel

It’s something I’ve gone through

So when your blue skies turn gloomy

The clouds are dark and grim

I will be there to talk to

Reaching the soul from within

I may not be able to change it

But I will sit and hear your sighs

My heart will reach out

Further than you realize

So scream…yell or sob

I will hold your hand…have your back

Your journey although different

I know where you are at

And I will sit and quietly listen

May shed a tear or two

For I remember that Fall day

When the one I needed…was you

We Try


We Try

The girl dropped to her knees

Like she had most every day

Father I have a question

Wanted to ask it in this way

Wouldn’t it just be easier

Given you know our true path

If you just told us what to do

So we wouldn’t fail in our task

One quiet whisper of a breeze

Softly spoke into her ear

On this one instance…one time

I will tell you this my dear

 

I’ve given you all the tools you need

To figure things in life out

But I will tell you the true path

So you will know without doubt

 

You are all destined for greatness

The only fork in the road

Comes up when you want to

Reap more than you have sown

 

You are supposed to be kind to others

As you would have them be to you

You would love your fellow man

Only a few things you should do

 

Look over my sweet children

They are tender in their heart

Stop using your anger to violate

And tear their worlds apart

 

Don’t over look the homeless

They are there for a reason

Don’t just acknowledge their presence

During holiday season

 

Whether homeless or not

Their lives…they matter too

Remember it is not what you say

It is what you do

Have you ever conversed

With someone in the park

Wondered where they will sleep

When everything gets dark

 

Can you imagine a park bench

Not a comfy bed

Or do you push it out of your mind

To brighter thoughts instead

 

These are the things I watch

Over you for

Are you opening your hearts

Or slamming shut doors

 

What could you do better you ask

I’ll tell you again now

Every day when you awake

Make it better somehow

 

Be thankful for your first breath

Stop living a life in greed

Think of self with your mind

It’s your heart others need

 

Stop the cycle of violence

It must come to an end

Stop racking up enemies

Who could be your friends

 

What is your path you ask

Give love its what it’s for

And when that task is done

Give them love some more

 

For when you are spreading my news

Of love…hope and joy

You are delivering a message

That they cannot avoid

For through the love of God

There is no mountain they can’t climb

The forks in their road

Are all a state of mind

 

For I love you my child

When you do your very best

And I watch over you lovingly

Every night when you rest

 

It is at that moment I realized

What the whisper meant to me

An attempt to do better

Opened a worlds possibility

I don’t know if it was God

Who spoke to me that way

But I’m thankful for the love

He sent down to me that day

My prayer for humanity is simple

On this we always can rely

We may fall short sometimes

But it’s important that we try

My Memory of You


My Memory of You

I often wish you were still here

But when I pause for a while

I remember my life fulfilled

Memories by the mile

I remember the funny things you said

Even using some of it now

Hoping to share your sweet love

Through my grief some how

I still yearn to escape

To your loving abode

Enjoying your take on life

The stories you told

Will anyone really ever

Hear the angel in your voice

Now it seems as if

There isn’t much choice

I miss your melodic harmony

Chased down with that smile

Blue eyes sparkling and dancing

In a world gone wild

It’s funny the things

We all take for granted

Saying words…doing harm

Things can’t be recanted

I laugh to myself when

I call to you in a dream

Seeming even in slumber

God knows what you mean

He sends you when I’m weary

Can’t seem to find my way

Reminding me to be thankful

For new memories I’ve made

So true you aren’t in them

But lucky for others and me

You are felt all around

Like the bark on my tree

Remember the story I told you

About people and a tree

Fruit and leaves are temporary

It’s the roots which ground me

You were always my root

Holding me steady and strong

Keeping my eyes on God

Right where they belonged

You are and were

My truest best friend

Which God bonded in blood

Were there til the end

And while my heart still aches

Over the loss of my sister my friend

I hold you closer still

With every memory I spend

For every memory I lend out

Reminds me that I didn’t lose at all

Instead of focusing on a broken heart

I’ve built a memory wall

So those who need it

Maybe are heart broken too

They can come and smile

At my memory of you

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