Tag Archive: violence



Ladies…its time to be angry
Men all over FB just logged off…lol
But seriously…
Anger is evoked by true strong emotions
We sit by and talk about everything…
And nothing at all…
We will talk about our sisters hair, nails
That outfit that…
She knew she had no business wearing…lol
And yet NOTHING is said…
IN order to change something…
You must accept it
This is the first step toward humility…
WE are being played…
WE are being used…
BUT…
Not by the men in our lives…
We are being used by a system…
Which is separating us from our DIVINE RIGHTS
You see it is stripping us of our loving tendencies…
This system says…You don’t need him…
You can do bad all by yourself
I can be both mommy AND DADDY
And to help you out in case you get stuck…
There are these great little programs to help you…
The truth is…
Those little programs…are the noose around our necks
Too many times we will turn away from the men in our families…
Im not talking about Joe Trick from down the block…lol
But the REAL men our lives….
And we will turn away from him because
He isn’t educated enough
…even though we are learning that our “Education” is filled with lies
He isn’t working enough
He doesn’t have a good car
The list tends to go on and on…
Relationships do not JUST happen
No one wakes up and just has a dream come true (usually)
We have to work for and toward these goals
We should be angry….
Because we know better than this…
YOU are the foundation in your family
YOU set the tone for your life
YOU balance his energy…
Be angry…
But if you waste that anger on
Who did what to whom
Or
Who owes YOU
You are wasting your energy…
Get angry
SCREAM….
The very system which has created these little programs to HELP you…
Also says…
If YOU are raped…
IT IS ALL….
Now HEAR ME….
This system says it is
ALL YOUR FAULT…
How do you like big brother now?
We are getting ready to show you how very beautiful
ANGRY WOMEN can look…
Because You understand…
WE are (NineTribe)
So
Are
You
 
 
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The Storm


The Storm

 

I have written and spoken many times about Domestic Violence. This is something that I, personally, survived. I know there are some people that may want me to be quiet about it and there are others that may NEED me to be quiet about it. But the problem with this is that I dream of a world where women don’t have to hide their faces in social media. I dream of a time and place where women don’t have to hide bruises or make excuses for a man that has no self-control.

Whether this is a world that you are unaware of or if it’s a life that you have and are trying to keep quiet…here is my message to you:

I survived a difficult cycle in my life…but there are others that are experiencing it and have no voice. I will continue to speak out on this, because whether it fits into our ideas about who a person “really” is or not…this behavior exists. Unless you have been through this, I don’t even think you could fathom what that life is like. And if any of us want this behavior swept under the rug or would prefer that it is not spoken on here or on our radio show…I am left to wonder why?

Everything in the darkness always comes to light…no doubt about that; even if that light is only there to show us who we really are.

Abuse comes in all sizes and shapes, all races, creeds and religions; we cannot think that because a woman doesn’t come forward when WE think she should…if she comes forward at all, that it isn’t true. There is nothing as tormenting as hiding behind bushes hoping that you won’t be seen. There is nothing quite like…fearing nighttime. There is nothing like being afraid everywhere you go…no one should have to live that way…yet there are those of us who will tell you…that struggle is very real.

I will not minimize it or make it seem “not THAT bad” to make another person more comfortable. What happened to me and so many other women should be screamed from the rooftops…only then will this learned behavior stop.

There is nothing like the damage that abuse does to you. It leaves scars and we carry those scars forever. We forever carry around the weight that those types of experiences taint our souls with. It is one thing to survive it…that in itself is miraculous…because too many of us aren’t lucky enough to escape and others of us are too afraid to try but it is quite another to have to break the cycle. The real struggle is when we find real love…that everlasting love and we are so busy watching for cues and clues of abuse that we destroy the innocent in our lives. Of course, that is the point of abuse, to destroy us for another person. I beg of you to not let that happen. I know it isn’t easy. Bruises are so much simpler to hide and heal than a soul that has been tortured.

I will forever speak out against this horrific life cycle. I may make people uncomfortable, but if that is the case…maybe we should ask ourselves …why? Why do you, I or anyone need this swept under the rug? Are we sick of hearing about it or are we hiding who we really are? Are we speaking out of line with the people in our lives? Calling one another names…belittling one another. Is this the best that we can do? Would silencing me make things easier?

Unfortunately silencing me will not change anything…and too many of my sisters are being battered and broken, by people that claim to love them. The time for awakening is now. We don’t have time to sit around and try to figure out why he hits, pushes, slaps, punches, or verbally assaults her. We have no more time to try to find an understanding about why he holds her captive monetarily. While I hope these individuals get the help that they need…it is not the victims place to try and FIX him…because you didn’t break him. Sometimes we have to love people from afar.

As for myself, I will continue to speak out against anyone…male or female that abuses another human being. No one should have to live this way and hiding from it …changes nothing. If you are a man or woman in this situation…speak out…you have a voice. You are not alone…reach out.

For all others that have requested that I silence my thunder…the storm is just beginning…buckle up.

I wish you all light and love.

http://www.blogtalkradio.com/mrol

 

~LM Young


We Are Ferguson

 

Some pain cannot be hidden, I have put off writing about the Ferguson, Missouri teen, Michael Brown…as long as I possible could.

Some pain is inevitable. I watched the video of the mothers of shooting victims: Michael Brown, Trayvon Martin, and Sean Bell. I have written numerous times about Trayvon Martin and his assailant George Zimmerman. I have expressed my sadness and disappointment in the outcome of the Zimmerman trial. I have even written to George Zimmerman personally, in my blog.

I watched as these strong women flexed their heart muscles toward one another. I could feel the pain they are dealing with, deeply. I know, as was said by one of them, the pain never leaves you. I can understand how that would be true. These strong women are a reigning example to all of us. They reached out to one another, not because they weren’t still in pain…but because they understood the feeling of isolation that losing a child can bring. The compassion they showed was about women…just being moms. Remembering the days when their children were laughing and smiling; lighter times where such tragedies weren’t even in the back of their minds. I admire the love and unity they gave to one another.

As a mother myself, I feel deeply hurt by the death of Michael brown. I am hurt by anyone that would think, say or believe that his murder was okay. Because you see, for me, he was a child. He had a home. He had a family. He had a life separate from what we will hear about in the media. He had a unique smile and contagious laughter…even if his mom was the only one that experienced it. He is a part of humanity…and he always will be.

His death wasn’t unfortunate…for that term tends to lean toward the base word “luck”. Michael Brown was gunned down…and his assailant Darren Wilson will have to live with that fact. We may never know what the day held for Michael Brown or Darren Wilson, before they met that day. Maybe they were confronted by death already. Perhaps someone had harassed or bullied them. Perhaps they had taken all they could stand that day. Possibly, all the patience they could muster had been spent elsewhere. We may never know the truth about the events leading up to the tragic death of this angel.

But from this I can tell you two things:

Michael Brown was gunned down needlessly. And while he may be a statistic that we refer to…he is so much more. I hope that when we think of him; we remember his face. For those that were fortunate enough to have spoken to him…remember his voice and how his eyes sparkled when he laughed. Remember all the greater things about him; do not let the way he left this place be the only conversation about him. He had a soul and he touched all those who walked with him…he even touched those that walked past him. I pray that his family finds some peace. I hope that we, as a nation, can look on this angel lovingly…with respect to his memory.

The other thing I know is this:

Like George Zimmerman, Darren Wilson must learn how to live with the consequences of his actions. His family will have to learn how to move forward…for not unlike Zimmerman, Officer Darren Wilson will forever be known as the cop that shot that kid six times….dead. This will not be an easy process…it is not intended to be. I pray that Darren Wilson is also able to come to grips with the reality of his actions. It is my hope that we start setting more strict guidelines for our law enforcement officers. We are losing too many of our young black men and something must change.

As a mother, I can tell you that it wouldn’t matter to me if my child had been killed by a police officer, or a trash collector. A white man or an Asian woman. It would only matter that I have one less place to set for dinner.

There is probably nothing as strong as a mothers love for a child; I hope one day we can all learn to love in that way…intentionally. Let us not look at what happened in Ferguson as an incident…it is a pandemic.

This did not happen to a small town in Missouri…it happened to all of us; and it continues to happened all over the world. This is not a matter of them and us…no matter how the media portrays it. We must see ourselves through the eyes of our children, because they do not see race or religion. They do not see sex or money. Children only see each other for exactly who they are….which is why they smile and laugh all of the time.

We are not better; we are not worse…

We are Ferguson.

I am Waging War


I am Waging War

I am waging war

I am putting down my mark

Against private wars against women

Which leave scars upon our hearts

A female journalist said

Don’t drink you won’t be raped

She even believing the lies

Leading to gender hate

A politician was quoted

Not saying it was her fault but…

Please Mister Government

That really is enough

We have allowed women

And their body parts to be used

As insults for our sons

Another form of abuse

You hit like a girl men yell

An insult for a boy

See we teach hate young

Leaving both sexes feeling a void

IF we teach our wonderful sons

That a female is a curse

Is it any wonder his opinion

Of women is the worst?

We are not only breeding hatred

Within our sons who are so young

But our daughters hate themselves

MY GOD…what have we done?

She feels she is unworthy

Maybe the assault was my fault

Please forgive us FATHER

This behavior has to stop

Remember the sluts that you talk of

Some ones daughter…someone’s mother

Of the sins we bathe in

When we fail to love one another

Please before it goes further

Weigh your words…they can be deadly

The time for forgiveness is now

Don’t you think the world is ready?

Ready to stand up for its sisters

Ready to speak out on her beauty

Yes…upward and onward

It’s our job…no OUR DUTY

Yes, I am waging war

I will no longer be idle

And you can call me one name

QUEEN is my title

So if you feel you have the urge

To spout negativity from afar

Go ahead I am ready…

I am waging war

When Is Rape Okay


When Is Rape Okay

When Is Rape Okay

Yesterday I saw a post on Facebook. I went to the author’s website and found (just for clarification); that when these high school students were asked to answer the questions, it was on a rating scale 0-5. Zero equaled not agreeing at all, therefore symbolic of “NO”. Any rating over zero, would be counted as a “yes”. I just wanted that to be clear before I wrote this, although I don’t think that the number on the scale that each child chose, above zero matters. Allow me just this courtesy…RAPE IS WRONG.

This post had me thinking, past the lump I felt in my throat. I was disappointed in the fact that these young males felt this way; for any man to think it would ever be okay to force sex upon another.  What I found deeply disturbing was that any female would think this behavior was acceptable; why would we think that any situation would make this horrible and vile act appropriate?

Beyond talking to our children about the dangers of strangers; what do we teach them? Do we teach our sons that it is NEVER okay to force anyone to have sex? Or do we think that the logic is implied? At this point, we can effectively come to the conclusion that it is not. Where are our daughters getting their education from? Why would anyone of our young women think that she has no say over her body? Where is the self-respect and honor? Where would our sons develop the mentality that they EVER have the right to force sex on another person?

This posting had my heart feeling heavy. If I learned nothing from the rape of the Steubenville, Ohio teen; I learned that far too many people think that when a woman is drunk or high…that consent is implied, even if she is unable to say no.

To the young men and women who answered “yes”; by responding that it was okay for a man to force a woman to have sex if:

1. He spends a lot of money on her

2. He is so turned on he doesn’t think he can stop

3. She is drunk or stoned

4. She has had sex with others

5. They have dated for a long time

6. She wanted to, but then changed her mind

Allow me to share something with you, rape cannot be changed. Rape is not one moment on a random day/night; rape lasts your entire life. You never forget the feeling of degradation. You never forget the questions that your mind poses, that will never have an answer. Rape is far reaching…no matter what anyone says.

Anytime someone tells you that rape isn’t THAT bad…they are lying. It destroys lives and can permanently destroy the hearts and souls of men and women.

As parents, it is our responsibility to arm our children with the knowledge of love. Respect must be taught…through observation. Our children are watching what we say, do and respond to; our speech must be kind and loving. Keep in mind, we teach our children callousness.

As for these young women, who also participated in this “poll”?

Love yourselves. No one has the right to force sex on you. Respect your body and your decisions; do what is right for you. You do not owe anyone anything; your body is sacred.

We need to change the rules, so we can change our frame of mind. If she/he does not say YES…the answer is no. If she/he says yes, then changes his/her mind…the answer is no. Paying for a meal, present or any other such thing…does NOT purchase him/her sexually. If you are so turned on that you don’t think you can stop…don’t even start. NO matter how long you have known him and no matter what your relationship is…it is always your decision to make.

We must do better. We are assisting in the demise of these young souls, by sitting in silence. We must take a pro-active role in the lives of these young people, who are our future. Rape is not a phase that someone goes through…it is a felony.

Remember my friends, rape is a crime that destroys. Talk to your sons and daughters; do not make excuses, like those made for the rapists in the Jane Doe case in Ohio. Stop placing the victim on trial, when we do this…we are embracing the sexual predator.

While no one wants to think their child is a predator, when we sweep such behavior under the rug…we are breeding it.

Love one another…and please…please stop the insanity.

If


If

If she tells you how he hurts her

Know that it is true

When you ask why she doesn’t tell

Remember she is turning to you

If you say it can’t be THAT bad

Or she wouldn’t ever stay

Know the dangers of judging

Don’t look at her that way

If she says that he hit her

Understand the sugar coating words

If you knew the extent of the truth

You would find it most absurd

Could you even fathom a life

Where hope is led astray

A life that once shined

Now is spent being afraid

If you are too busy discounting

Making excuses placing blame

You leave her abandoned

In her abuse induced shame

If you criticize her choices

As if you could do it better

You may push her over that cliff

Where she is lost forever

Wouldn’t it be worth the risk

In case she was lying

Than to forsake her safety

So many women are dying

If she comes to you for help

Know that it took all she had

It places her safety at risk

He could get angry, violent and mad

If for just a moment

You could wear her battle scars

You too would pray for relief

When you look up at the stars

You would have a deeper understanding

Of how she prays to not wake

Your reaction to her cries

All the difference it could make

The statistics are minimal

The pain of abuse is far reaching

Our children are watching

What ideas are we teaching

Reach out for her heart

I know this life too well

Extend a loving heart

Where God…always dwells

If you want to make a difference

Open your heart…lend an ear

She needs compassion…hope

While she lives in such fear

Women are abused daily

So listen closely to this

Please don’t waste time

On the judgmental ‘IF”


I Will Survive

Dear John Smith
This letter is overdue
Don’t let the anonymity fool
I’m not protecting you

I am in fact freeing me
By telling your story loud
I’m tired of living in fear
And getting lost in a crowd

You are just a simple number
There are many…evil as you
Who steal a woman’s hope and joy
While robbing her virtue

You should be ashamed
But you never behaved as such
You scarred my inner self
Making me quiver to a loving touch

You made me afraid of life
You made me afraid of me
You made me question myself
Who I used to be

But on this day I tell you
I fear you no more
I’m not afraid of the torture
Or whatever you have in store

You may have taken a piece
Of a special part of me
But I refuse to become you
A blister on humanity

I am my Fathers daughter
I stand tall…head held high
My heart stronger than ever
A tear slips through my sigh

I am sorry I ever gave you
A single bit of power
Taking the life away
From this most beloved flower

I am sorry that you are so sorry
I regret ever taking part
In a relationship so violent
Where you broke more than my heart

But today I am wiser
Today I am aware
You are just a battle wound
To me…you aren’t there

So claim victory if you must
But I will tell you the truth
There is no injury so severe
That God won’t see me through

I am not your possession
I am not ill gotten gains
I survived your Evil ways
And my faith…it remains

So crawl back to your hole
Where true cowardice lights
I am a warrior…forever
And I will survive


My True Relief

I have known pain

I have known tears

I have known abuse

That causes REAL fear

I have known frustration

I have known isolation

I have known illness

I have known degradation

I have known loneliness

I have known hate

I have known racism

And other ills we create

I have known insincerity

I have known lies

I have known hurt so deep

Words cannot define

But when I let go of these

Reasons for being apart

When I looked with my soul

And opened up my heart

I realized that these things

Made me a woman who is strong

And what felt like years and years

Didn’t really last that long

For I am fueled by a source

Who says I am LIGHT

It fills my being

And clears my obstructed sight

I have known those things…yes

But let me tell you what

I have known much more

Than what I have not

I have known joy

I have known love

I have known peace

Given from above

So while I may have known disaster

And devastating illness and grief

I have also known HIM

My Father…my TRUE relief

The Right Choice


The Right Choice

Once upon a time

In an unspoken space

A little girl was touched

In an unmentionable place

No fairy tale heroine

No wishes did come true

She learned the hard way

How the pain…it grew

She cried silent tears

To a parent who didn’t care

She just wanted to be loved

It really wasn’t fair

She should have been safe

Inside the privacy of her home

Instead she lived a life

No one could have known

Sure we suspected at times

That something may be wrong

But our silent objections

Went on far too long

How could we have let her

Be invaded be attacked

No longer an opinion

A publicly known fact

We sat and did nothing

Now we shed a tear

While this angel of peace

Had to live in fear

Shame on the parents

For the sins they would do

Shame on us all

We are guilty too

For it takes a village

To embrace God’s children now

Not sure when it happened

But we forgot that somehow

May God forgive us all

For we failed his lamb for sure

We turned deaf ears to

The crying of the pure

Failure is not an option

Yet we would rather choose to be

Lost than to walk toward

Our own humanity

After all she wasn’t our child

I guess maybe we forgot

We made a divine promise

Now it’s us who’s lost

Join with me please now

Speak out against this thing

That is killing our children

And the innocence they bring

Dare to stand up tall

Let chips fall where they may

And help save a child who

May be killed this way

Be the voice that they need

Be the sword they can’t wield

Be the truth that they seek

When God is our shield

Say I love you to this child

By giving her heart a voice

It is all up to us now

Let’s make the right choice

The Eagle


The Eagle

You walked through a raging fire

You weathered a storms intent

You survived more than most

And higher you went

You rose above the ashes

Like a Phoenix high and proud

Searching for brethren

Somewhere in the crowd

Just looking for a person

To acknowledge your fight

Someone to understand

How you made it right

But even if your journey

May seem cold and slight

Your decisions touch many

Who couldn’t see past the night

I commend you for your decision

To do what your conscience dictates

Maybe they will follow you

And the path that you create

For the first step is the hardest

Loneliest often too

But what is right is right

I am thankful for you

For the struggle of a warrior

Is harder than they will say

Fighting isn’t half as hard

As finally walking away

A warriors face I understand

The battle cry is our creed

But you can elevate above nations

Setting our lives free

You are the example we hoped for

You committed to a change

It might be a struggle

I know it may seem strange

But fight that good fight now

Don’t let it pull you back through

All eyes are on the Eagle

Yes they are watching you

So never think it in vain

The journey you have made

Leaving was the best decision

You have ever made

Show the children who are watching

To stand tall and be true

Because they watch the eagle

Yes…they are watching you

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