What is Death?
So I was thinking today…what does death mean to me?
This is important this time of year, because of the holidays that we have spent together. Anyone who has ever lost anyone due to death knows what I am talking about; we do not want to take special occasions that we spent, with those loved ones, and make them hurtful or negative to think about.
There had to be another way to think about this, I thought to myself. Holidays are physical dates; we can’t cry or scare them away with our inability to evolve our feelings into experiences. I noticed though, especially in myself, that was exactly what I wanted to do. What I noticed was, my sisters birthdate was still going to happen…whether my heart was ready for it or not. The holidays that we used to create beautiful memories…were still going to be holidays that come back around every year…even if I was angry that I was standing here…alone.
How do I make this better for myself, so I can make it more bearable for others that love me too?
Death became something different to me on January 4th. On that date death became my enemy; it was out to hurt me…and hurt I did.
I remembered thinking to myself, as I did as a child when traumatic things happened, what could I have possibly done to deserve this? This, of course was a very immature thought and my higher-self did not allow me to hold onto the direction this was going toward.
When I was reminded that this wasn’t about me; it brought back an image from TV or movies…where the actress was grabbed by the shoulders or smacked in the face…”SNAP OUT OF IT”!!
Okay, so I got that it wasn’t about me…but I felt the emptiness and blankness that this loss gave me.
I guess time was all I needed to make sense out of this. I loved my sister; and her death I felt was almost a welcome relief for her. She would no longer know pain or disappointment…and I could want no less for her and still claim to love her.
What does death mean to me? Death is our life “wake up” call. It reminds us how short our time on earth really is. How are we going to spend our last days and moments here? The last thing I would want to leave as my legacy is that I was angry at death…before it ever knocked on my door.
Death leaves a trail of grief; it has no time line. It can come rushing back into our thoughts without any notice. We all have to survive it the best way that we can. I took the bittersweet memories of my sister and created a recipe of life basted in love.
I think we all know someone who lost someone…let us be there for them. Nothing begins the healing process like a cup of kindness and a dash of laughter.
Laugh often…share memories; the place these angels had in our lives was filled beautifully…don’t let that be in vain. Spread their memories…shine their love through your laughter.
Upon writing this I learned of the death of actor Paul Walker. I hope you will join me in praying for his daughter and family…during this most difficult time.
As always…may Love and Light be with you forever.